Need a Little Perspective?

I gotta tell ya, I sure needed perspective at the end of last week. I was bothered. Frustrated. Angry. Stressed. Easily Irritable. All the things I shouldn't be. And really, I think its because I lost my focus, and didn't have my mind where it needed to be.

I got so caught up in these little 4 walls that I couldn't see the bigger picture. Kids fighting over toys. Pushing each other. Generally just being miserable to each other. Much screaming, generally on Gabe's part (he is quite pleased with his new trick...sigh). Abbi was being sassy, as usual, but at the same time, unusually sassy. Lets just say last week was filled with much kid drama.

So on Friday night when I got a phone call from a friend that they had removed her foster child from her home
...I got all the perspective I needed.

I can't really go into many details, but I guess her capability to care for the child came into question, they did some assessments, and just like that, the girl never came home from school, the foster Mom got a phone call informing her that the child had been removed, and to get the child's things together because they would be by in 1 hour to pick them up. No warning, nothing. I mean I can't even imagine. Her world dropped out all around her.

So when I hear that story and watch it unfold and see how broken and hurt my friend is. Well, that gave me perspective on the small things that I let frustrate me. I have two kids safe at home right now. Snug in their beds. They are generally healthy. I can feed them, clothe them, and most importantly love them. What more could I ask for?

Another big drama last week in the Nepper house was Rob's work situation. He has been with a very well established company for almost 3 years. They have given him numerous raises in his time there. They paid for him to go to school to become a carpenter. They contribute to his RRSP. I mean the list of perks goes on and on. But when they informed him that there would be no work until the beginning of April, he quickly began to look at his options.

The option he thinks is best is to return to his original company, and so he called them shortly after hearing this news to see if there were any openings for him. This company is a good company, but has also seen a lot of changes since Rob has been gone, including new ownership. As good of a company it is, I just don't see the same list of perks. So earlier this week he called, and accepted the job. And while we don't exactly see eye to eye on the subject, I do have to support him, and I'm really working on not just typing that, but actually doing it as well. So that caused much drama around the Nepper household last week.

Later in the week when I phoned a friend and she told me her that her husband has sustained an injury, and he has been living with pain from it for months, and they finally realized he will be needing two surgeries to repair the problem...well,
I got all the perspective I needed.

They are another single income family, with the husband being the main bread winner. Now with the news that he will be out of commision for who knows how long, well, that can be scary stuff. And here I am frustrated that my husband is switching companies, yet I should be happy that he even has that option and happy that he is healthy and able to work. And heck, that he's even willing to work!

Then with all of Rob's newfound Ph-ness, and its not like I am not pleased with this development, but I'm the kind of gal that likes to slowly ease into things. So when you tell me that we should cut out dairy, meat, and bread...well, um, yeah, that doesn't go over so well. I mean if you've done the math that leaves just plain 'ol vegetables, and with two kids that just ain't going to happen anytime soon. I'm thrilled by how excited he is about it, but I also find it a bit hard when it goes to the most hardcore extreme possible. Like whoa, hold up, let me catch up here. Or heck, maybe even do something different...

But again, later in the week I talked to my neighbor. The parents are likely in their mid-50's and have two grown children who still live at home. The Mom had breast cancer a few years ago now, but survived. The Dad was diagnosed as having cancer somewhere in his intestine in June of last year. He spent a good portion of the summer in the hospital, came home, had to go back in November for a follow up surgery and was home by Christmas. Things were looking good, the cancer was gone, until January 3rd, when a fire truck and two ambulances pulled up...

She (his wife) told me that due to years of smoking, and a poor diet he has cirrhosis of the liver and his liver is shot. Not to mention his kidneys are now failing. And they think the cancer is back, and there is nothing they can do...well, I'm sure you guessed it,
I got all the perspective I needed!

So he is now living out his last days in the pallitaive care ward, dying what sounds like a very horrible death. Not like death is every really a nice thing, but it just sounds awful. So why is it that I'm frustrated when my husband trying to become more healthy? Geesh, he's actually alive, and here with me, and again, what more can I ask for?

So please don't garner from all of my perspectiveness that none of our stuff matters or isn't important, but I don't think its the entire story. There is a great big world outside of our front doors that is hurting, and well, really when I take into account the big, big picture...well, really? How much more important and valuable and eternal it is to pour my energy into comforting a friend who has lost a child, rather than wasting my energy on getting frustrated with my kids. Or I should just be grateful that my hsuband even has options when it comes to his work situation, which many people in our country don't have. Or I should do what I can to support my husband's lifestyle changes, rather than grumble about them.

So this weekend, and next week, if you are in need of perspective, over the little things, I dare you to look out your front door, because there will always be a sadder story.

~

In other Nepper news, I thought I would just quickly share my exciting news I got yesterday. I listen to Joe FM, and if you've ever phoned us, you've likely heard on our answering machine "I listen to Joe...you've reached the Nepper house..." So when the radio station call numbers came up on the call display I nearly lost my lunch I was so nervous. If you answer your phone with "I listen to Joe" you win $1000, and if you can name a song they played in the last hour, you get another $1000. Well, that wasn't the contest I won (they were calling for another reason), but I did win a night out for Rob and I this coming Sunday night.

I won an "Evening with the Fray" at the Winspear Centre on Sunday night. Now if you haven't heard of the Fray, they are still fairly new on the scene (maybe within the last 2 or 3 years), but their most recent well-known song is "You Found Me" (but their most popular song is "How to Save a Life"). So not only do we get to go to the concert, but we get to meet them!

Now I'm not really a die hard fan, but I do enjoy their music. I have no idea what I will say to them or heck even ask them. Although in the "You Found Me" song he talks about finding God sitting on a street corner and how he's smoking his last cigarette. I guess the only thing I can think of is why did God have to be a smoker?

Le Fray...

Anyway, I'm terribly thrilled. We have babysitting all figured out. This will be our 3rd time to the Winspear, which is a beautiful concert hall. A very fancy concert hall right in the heart of downtown. So I've already picked out my outfit, and this time I'll try to remember to take pictures.